Chapter 10
There were many times during my cancer journey when I learned to live by the old and trusted adage.
'Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.'
I had resigned myself to living the rest of whatever life I had left with a colostomy. Before my big operation I still did not know what the outcome would be. Anything was still possible. I felt in my heart like everything was going to be good, but with cancer you just never know.
Only someone with cancer or who has had cancer can truly understand the overwhelming feeling how cancer takes over your entire life.
Cancer has and always plays by its own rules.
Since I vowed to myself a return to the ice eight months after surgery, I needed to find a way to be able to play hockey with the bag. I researched on the internet and found many people with colostomies of all ages who were living a much more active life than I had ever lived. It was very encouraging to see that participating in any sport was possible, including competitive swimming and diving.
I found a company in the States that had developed a special support belt designed for contact sports. The reviews were excellent and at a couple hundred bucks, it was a small price to pay so I could play. I also learned that during strenuous exercise the colon becomes less active so the bag will not usually fill during any physical activity. So long as I started with an empty bag and took an Imodium, I figured the belt would be my best option.
I bookmarked the site fully expecting to be ordering one after my surgery was complete.
I was very nervous the couple of weeks leading up to my big operation. It was all I thought about. I had never had surgery, let alone major surgery. All my blood work was good and the EKG confirmed my heart was strong enough to withstand the stress my body was about to be put under.
I looked completely ridiculous in my new T.E.D stockings. They camouflaged with my pasty white legs right up to my thighs and at fifty bucks per pair I only bought the one pair.
I received many well wishes from family and friends. Even my two ex's called to tell me they still loved me and wished me the very best. It’s funny how people react when you have cancer. Everyone means well, everybody tries to say the right thing; but cancer makes a lot people really uncomfortable.
I assured everyone I was in good hands and Sherry would be sending updates while I was in the hospital.
My last gym visit was on February 20th.
Only someone with cancer or who has had cancer can truly understand the overwhelming feeling how cancer takes over your entire life.
Cancer has and always plays by its own rules.
Since I vowed to myself a return to the ice eight months after surgery, I needed to find a way to be able to play hockey with the bag. I researched on the internet and found many people with colostomies of all ages who were living a much more active life than I had ever lived. It was very encouraging to see that participating in any sport was possible, including competitive swimming and diving.
I found a company in the States that had developed a special support belt designed for contact sports. The reviews were excellent and at a couple hundred bucks, it was a small price to pay so I could play. I also learned that during strenuous exercise the colon becomes less active so the bag will not usually fill during any physical activity. So long as I started with an empty bag and took an Imodium, I figured the belt would be my best option.
I bookmarked the site fully expecting to be ordering one after my surgery was complete.
I was very nervous the couple of weeks leading up to my big operation. It was all I thought about. I had never had surgery, let alone major surgery. All my blood work was good and the EKG confirmed my heart was strong enough to withstand the stress my body was about to be put under.
I looked completely ridiculous in my new T.E.D stockings. They camouflaged with my pasty white legs right up to my thighs and at fifty bucks per pair I only bought the one pair.
I received many well wishes from family and friends. Even my two ex's called to tell me they still loved me and wished me the very best. It’s funny how people react when you have cancer. Everyone means well, everybody tries to say the right thing; but cancer makes a lot people really uncomfortable.
I assured everyone I was in good hands and Sherry would be sending updates while I was in the hospital.
My last gym visit was on February 20th.
I was happy to have been able to push myself with thirty-two strenuous workouts in the six weeks since my chemo/rad treatments ended. With each workout, I pushed myself harder than the previous one. I felt like I was in the best shape of my life, well with one big exception.
I still had cancer.
I was positive I had now finally sweated out any residue from the chemo that may have remained in my body.
The Winter Olympics from Sochi was the focus of the hockey world that February. Canada had won the gold medal back in 2010 on home soil in Vancouver. Due to the Olympics, the N.H.L had shut down for two weeks and I was missing the Leaf games on television. There would be up to four potential Leaf games during my hospital stay. I knew I would not be watching the first one the day after surgery against the Islanders because I would be in ICU for a few days.
There are no televisions in ICU.
On February 23 Canada won their second straight gold medal with a 3-0 win over Sweden. I now had two complete days left to wait and the second day I spent mostly on the toilet courtesy of the MoviPrep.
On February 25th I went to bed early. It would be my last sleep with a rectal tumour, but would it be my last sleep with cancer?
The Winter Olympics from Sochi was the focus of the hockey world that February. Canada had won the gold medal back in 2010 on home soil in Vancouver. Due to the Olympics, the N.H.L had shut down for two weeks and I was missing the Leaf games on television. There would be up to four potential Leaf games during my hospital stay. I knew I would not be watching the first one the day after surgery against the Islanders because I would be in ICU for a few days.
There are no televisions in ICU.
On February 23 Canada won their second straight gold medal with a 3-0 win over Sweden. I now had two complete days left to wait and the second day I spent mostly on the toilet courtesy of the MoviPrep.
On February 25th I went to bed early. It would be my last sleep with a rectal tumour, but would it be my last sleep with cancer?
I prayed to Jehovah for the first time in forty years that it would be.